From People-Pleasing to Pleasure: A Mother’s Journey Through Embodiment & Intimacy Work

I did everything right, or so I thought.

I was married, we had two beautiful children, and a cozy house in the suburbs. We traveled, made memories & traditions, it was nothing short of a fairy tale in so many ways.

But under the surface I was drowning and disconnected from myself in more ways than I could fathom.

Depressions plagued me, to the point of ideations. I felt disconnected from my children, my husband, and ultimately myself and my truth. I couldn’t name it then, but I had built a life I didn’t feel at home in.

I was invited into experiences that expanded my beliefs on traditional monogamous relationships. I told myself it was a wonderful self-growth opportunity. I had hoped it would create space for more connection, deeper intimacy, and new life in places that had started to feel stale.

I said yes to things I didn’t want. I watched myself tolerate situations that were for someone else’s pleasure. While physical freedom was exhilarating, the emotional intimacy was missing and something about it all felt hollow.

So instead of connection and intimacy, I found myself in ruptures that never found repair, a deeper disconnection to myself, a lack of self-trust, and no map for how to honor my “no” when I’d spent my whole life defaulting to what others wanted.

I was a shell of myself and on the verge of what felt like a mental breakdown. I nearly enrolled in a month-long yoga teacher training in the jungle, not because I wanted to teach yoga but because I saw no other option but to leave everything behind, my family, my responsibilities, the life I’d built, just to breathe.

What I didn’t know was that everything was about to change…

A friend invited me to an ecstatic dance. I wasn’t sure what to expect but with music pulsing, bodies flailing without a care in the world, something cracked inside me. Moving my body in ways I hadn’t before, not caring what others thought, fully immersed in the present moment, I cried in the middle of that dance floor. I’d finally felt something real, something honest, something that actually belonged to me. And that was the first breadcrumb.

I started exploring sensual embodiment and somatic healing. I’d spent most of my adolescence intellectualizing my pain—talk therapy, family systems, “why I am the way I am.” But learning to heal through the body was a completely different language. Foreign, but deeply familiar. Like a dialect I had always known, but forgotten how to speak.

I was enamored.

A few months later, I enrolled in a three-month emotional intelligence program, and everything I thought I knew about myself began to unravel. It turned out that my life was the result of people-pleasing, inherited patterns, and the unspoken agreement that it was safer to be agreeable than authentic. No wonder I didn’t feel at home in my own skin.

And so, everything changed.

My marriage ended, I moved back out to the country, I entered a deep season of undoing. I navigated split custody, medicine journeys, and a long-overdue return to my nervous system. For the first time, I started making decisions that were actually mine. And as liberating as it was, it was also terrifying and full of grief.

The guilt was unbearable at times. I had dismantled a family that, on the surface, looked perfect. So many people didn’t understand. And for a long time, I carried the crippling weight of that judgment. 

But I knew that if I kept choosing what looked right over what felt true, I’d lose myself completely. So, I chose me.

We are born into systems that teach us to shrink. To follow rules we never agreed to. To be logical, question our desires & silence our intuition. To carry shame around the very things that make us feel alive and bring us pleasure. To look outside ourselves for the divine.

When you start honoring what’s real, what’s actually yours. Well, life rearranges itself. You lose some things, people don’t always understand, and what comes next is built on truth.

Amidst the undoing, a relationship was growing, one that reflected a version of me I was only just starting to meet.

This love was rooted in truth and devotion. It asked more of me but in the most tender and liberating ways. We created a connection that is non-traditional, inspirational, and that continues to stretch and support me… and now our community in Houston as well.

When I found Tantra, something clicked into place that I didn’t have the words for.

It gave me a language for what my body had been asking for all along. It offered a path back into connection, one that included breath, sensation, vulnerability, and reverence. Through tantra, I stopped bypassing my body to reach for someone else’s approval.

Rituals became a way of life, divinity had new meaning, and the somatic work I loved so much got a massive (and sexy) upgrade.

And now, this is the work I do.

I teach what I wish I’d had when I first set out on my quest for deeper connection and more fulfilling intimacy.

Alongside my lover, we hold space for people like you to come home to your body, cultivate deep connections, and discover truth that isn’t sourced from someone else’s script.

So, if you’ve been living a life you barely recognize… if you walked away from religion and still ache for something sacred… if you’re craving a deeper connection to your body, your truth, your desires, & your relationship, you’re not alone.

We create experiences where intimacy is practiced, not just discussed. Where your body isn’t something to hide or manage, but a sacred channel to your own inner knowing.

And we are SOOOO here for that flavor of holy rebellion.

We’re building community, IRL here in Houston. Come see what we’re up to!